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It's Not You, It's Him: The Zero-Tolerance Approach to Dating

Product ID : 29043421


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About It's Not You, It's Him: The Zero-Tolerance Approach

Product Description In her upbeat new “rules” for finding lasting love, Dr. Georgia Witkin shows that the secret to dating without all the pain is to assume that you are perfectly lovable exactly as you are. When a good date goes bad, the problem is never you. It’s him! Suddenly dating is so simple. You will never again ask “why didn’t he call?” It doesn’t matter. You will never ask, “How should I change?” You don’t have to. Instead you will do what you want, go where you want, wear what you want, and it will only make you more perfect. You will take everything dates say and do as information about them—not you. You will have zero tolerance when you’re getting zero. You will feel happy, in control, and actually enjoy dating again. And before too long, the new you will fall wildly in love with a man who is just perfect enough to find you irresistible. This book will make dating fun again—and help you find the love you always dreamed of. “Why is this book for single women? Because we think about relationships, and talk about relationships, much more than single men do. And when things go wrong, we’re also much more likely to blame ourselves! We ask ourselves, “What’s wrong with me?” “What did I do?” “What should I have done differently?” Well, maybe, just maybe you are not the problem. Maybe, just maybe, you’d still be single even if you were perfect. Maybe the men you’re meeting have the problems. Maybe it’s not you, it’s him! Actually, there’s no maybe about it. Your aunt in Florida, your married brother, and your gym friends are wrong—you are not single because you’re too picky, too pushy, or a princess. Besides, even if you were, picky, pushy princesses get married every day. And so will you. So let’s get real and get you the life you want.” --Dr. Georgia Witkin, from… It’s Not You, It’s Him About the Author GEORGIA WITKIN is director of The Stress Program at New York’s Mt. Sinai Medical Center, where she is an assistant clinical professor of psychiatry. She is also weekly contributor to the Fox News Channel’s Fox Magazine show and news analyst on the Fox and Friends morning program. She lives in New York City. Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved. 1Assume You're Perfect You're single, and your mother says you're too hard to please, your sister says you're too assertive, and your friends say you should play hard to get. You argue with them, but you suspect that they may be right. You've begun to believe that you're too picky, too pushy, or a princess. Right? Well, here's a news flash: even if they are right, it doesn't matter. The odds are that you would still be single even if you were perfect! The real problem isn't you at all. It isn't your hair, your weight, your job, your hobbies, your accent, your family, or your perfume. It isn't that you're too choosy, cautious, or combative. It isn't that you're too shy or too social, too spoiled or too stingy, too career-minded or too marriage-minded. Somewhere, there is a guy for you . . . actually, many guys. But all you need is one. And he'll fall in love with you as you are. To him you'll be perfectly lovable. Take the case of Marianne: Marianne just got engaged. Her friend told me that Marianne ran into an old flame (her Mr. Big!) at a party and they started seeing each other again, for what must be the fourth time. Her friend said she was in despair that Marianne would do this to herself again. But listen to this! They went on vacation together to a pricey resort, and this time Marianne decided to stop trying so hard to please him, and instead she decided to do whatever she wanted to do (sleep late, go to the spa). If he went to play golf at dawn, well, so be it. She was prepared to be dumped again and was just going along for the ride. But instead of breaking her heart again, he proposed! Had Marianne's boyfriend proposed this time because he thought she was too needy before and now saw her as more independent? Had things changed